When you are a child, your self-control is under development, of which, a lot of times you end up being obedient not so much because you have learned to constrain yourself, but mainly because the person insisting upon your obedience has the power to hurt, damage, or harm you. However, at a certain point you are no longer a child, and if you have not developed good self-control, the lack of having such, can create troublesome problems that can cost you just about everything that you cherish.
In this world, there are people, that look to exploit others, and to thereby probe for other people's weaknesses, in which, those that lack self-control, have such a weakness, providing those that are aware of such, to have therefore the option and to correspondingly take the prerogative in pushing the buttons that enables them to take advantage of that person's lack of self-control, by inducing a reaction to a situation that will embarrasses or compromise the other, all to the advantage of the one that is pulling the strings.
So then, the lack of self-control is a character flaw that one should want to correct so as to control themselves appropriately, especially in stressful and meaningful situations, rather than to respond impulsively and without thinking through the consequences of one's actions before making that response. This would imply strongly that those that curse at us, violate our space, challenge our integrity, and so on and so forth, are testing us to such a degree that we are given the opportunity to demonstrate that we are in command of our own self as compared to allowing our lack of restraint to produce foolish and regrettable actions.
The thing about the lack of self-control, is almost always, we later have a chance to reflect upon our behavior and our response in regards to those situations in which we have either maintained our discipline and our measured response, or we have not, in which, many more times than not, losing our temper, and losing our control, demonstrates in retrospect that we really didn't need to react in that manner, that there indeed were other more suitable options, and we chose the wrong one.
None of the foregoing indicates that our self-control needs to be of the manner of a doormat, or unresponsive, it instead means that we should look upon those situations when we are being tested, as if we are being tested, for we are, and therefore, these tests are ones that we should want to pass in order to demonstrate that we are actually mature human beings, that do not add unnecessarily fuel to the fire, but respond in a manner that shows that we have the wisdom to recognize that other people in their actions and reactions aren't always mature, responsible, or wise, so therefore we appropriately restrain ourselves and exercise good discernment.
So too, when we are pushed wrongly by someone in some way, we are able to show our growth, or lack of it, specifically by our response to such a situation, in which, we should let our better judgment lead us, rather than utilize our unrestrained ego instead. Those that exhibit good self-restraint, go further in life, and are more positive people, because they have mastered themselves, which is the very first step in being able to help aid others, for if your house is in a shambles, or has doors and windows ajar, how are you readily able to really help others in their quest to repair and to secure their own homes?